Seven Thousand Feet Down

As we snake around the mountain roads, I lean to the inside. First twisting right, then left, all that separates us from rolling head-over-hills down the cliff is a piece of metal knee high. I forgot I was afraid of heights when I booked this trip to Mesa Verde National Park in Colorado.  Arriving at our destination 7,000 feet above sea level, we hike along a path dug out of the rock to the pueblo cliff dwellings. My heart beats harder than from the exertion and my legs threaten to freeze at a moments notice. I would have been the weak link in this 800 year old neighborhood at 100 Cliff Palace.

Back at our room for the night in the national park, we are granted a room with a view. Everyone else would love it but as I try to sleep, with the howling wind, the image of this lodge bolted into the cliff feeds my anxiety. I wonder if I will sleep at all. What ensues is a struggle between light and darkness in the pitch black stormy night on a cliff. I wrestle with my fearful thoughts for two hours while the rest of my family snores away.

I focus on the fear I don’t want to have.

I focus on the worry of being awake all night.

I focus on maintaining control and not letting the anxiety get the best of me.

It’s hard for me to put myself totally in God’s arms so I struggle against darkness for two hours.  Winning than losing and over again.

Around midnight I feel overwhelmed by the anxiety and pray for help.

Something changes, the battle is transformed, God takes charge and brings to mind what I’m thankful for. He changes my focus.

Lying in bed, I thank God for my husband, and children.

I thank God for my parents and sibling.

My muscles relax, terror loses it grip, and somehow I fall asleep free from anxiety. I wake up well rested and a bit wiser on a couple of fronts.

·         I realize that I am unable to fight any of my battles, even a war with fear, except with His help. 1 Peter 5:7 says cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. (NIV) Remarkably, I can’t do even this without God’s help.      

·         I also realize Biblical instructions can be taken to heart specifically. For example in Philippians 4:6 it says to not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  When I read this scripture, key words jump out at me: anxious, prayer, and thanksgiving. These are specific instructions. Anxiety is lessened when we pray and are thankful. It is a part of our nature that when we engage in a positive emotion, such as thankfulness or love, the negative emotions of fear lessen. 

This truth is continued in Philippians 4:8:

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. (NIV) We are in a battle between lightness and dark. By focusing on the dark the dark wins.

Prayer and a positive focus, these are God’s instructions for keeping negative emotions at bay whether we are worried about our children’s future, wondering how we can bear the pain, or are struggling with a fear of heights at seven thousand feet.