Monday, June 20, 2016


Kung Fu Forgiveness




My son fancies himself as a karate expert and one day after watching a Chinese Kung Fu show he decided to test out his knife skills in the kitchen. With no one else around, he swung his knifes, battling the imagery evil doers that surrounded him. Connecting with some skin in his imagination was in reality, slashing a hole in the meshing of the pull-down faucet nozzle.

That night, when I went to prepare supper, a small spray of water wet the front of my shirt. I promptly wrapped it up in electric tape, lived with the slight drip that accompanied turning on the sink, and forgot about it for a long time.

Months later, my mom visited. Looking for cleaning supplies, something I admit I rarely do, my mom noticed wet boards under the sink. My first thought was Ben’s kung fu was causing this leak. What a mess! As the smell of routing wood filled the kitchen, all I could think of was all the extra work his carelessness had caused me.

Two mornings later, as I looked under the sink and decided to address the issue, my crabbiness built as I pulled out the cleaning supplies and realized just how much water was there.

At seven I woke Ben up, in typical loving style, with what was wrong with the sink, how he would need to pay for it, and what he would have to do about it followed by, “Good morning.” Needless to say he didn’t go off to school skipping and radiating the love of his mother that morning. Instead he issued a few choice words and raced off to catch the bus.

As I reflected during my Bible study that morning I realized Ben and I hadn’t been getting a long very well since my mom had discovered the leak and the reason was not because of him. It was because of me. I was not forgiving him for his Kung Fu because it was making my life more difficult.  Then the following words of Jesus came to mind.

 “And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.”  (Mark 11:25 NIV)

I assumed that Jesus’ instruction also included Bible study so I put down my Bible and wrote the following letter of confession.



Dear Ben,

I am sorry that I was so agitated with you last night and this morning. I realize that I contributed to your bad mood. I was having trouble forgiving you for what you did to the kitchen sink. . . .



Finishing my letter another scripture came to mind. In Matthew 5: 23-24 Jesus said, “Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.”

It is clear by both of these scripture the importance God puts on us getting right with the people in our lives. We are to stop offering and pause in our prayers in order to take care of the business of forgiveness and reconciliation! Unfortunately most of us would rather throw a large check in the offertory plate than fess up to holding a grudge and then let it go.

We also often know and focus on forgiving people of the big issues. Forgiving the dad that wasn’t there, the spouse who cheated, or the person who injured a love one, but learning how to forgive starts with the little things that get under our skin and continue to give us aggravation and family conflict. It’s often the forgiveness of these little things that sets the daily tone in our homes.

As we gather with family and friends this summer, forgiveness and reconciliation are perhaps two of the most important factors in determining whether love and joy will join us in the summer sun. Are you willing to take Jesus’ words to heart and give the greatest gifts we can give ourselves, our loved ones, and our Savior? Forgive it all. Forgive the little things like the toilet seat that is always up. Forgive the jelly left out all night again, and forgive the big water mess that was brought about because of a son’s imagination and a kung fu slice of a knife.

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